It came upon a midnight Clear.

You probably wondering what the title of the post means, or if you do you know it's the first line of a Christmas Carol, that was the last song my dad and I ever sang together ever anywhere, we sang it together in church i cant rememeber the year. But it was before he fell sick i don't think I have sang in front of any congregation ever since.

I really don't like Christmas, it's not my favorite part of the year, my dog a white retriever called terry had not been home for like a day which was very unusual, i loved this dog, it was so smart. I could go on and on i won't stop.

So i went looking for it shouting it's name till i was pointed in the direction of a dead dog by someone who guessed we were looking for a dog. As soon as I saw it my heart sank i cried all the way home, i recall the sound of Boney M Christmas carol playing on the stereo. That Christmas was not a great one, i really can't remember what happened that year, but i remember my dad talking to me, trying to make me understand what life was all about. While i was walking him to the bustop one day he was going to work.

I have been wondering for a while now, is there really life after death?

How are we going to relate with our dearly departed, if we end up being reunited in the "after life"  what are we going to talk about? How do we catch up?. Have you ever sat down to think about it?.

I really don't know how i would handle it, i miss my dad yeah, but i don't know how i would handle it. Was the whole life after death a made up story so we won't feel we would be gone for good, and eventually fade away over time.

IT DOESN'T JUST MAKE SENSE

What i have done

I've always had a passion for technology and knowing how things worked.

When I was young I got electrocuted twice, doing thesame thing!! I guess the second time I thought I could somehow do it differently. Well I can now tell you that whatever it is I was handling put me in my place... Literally. 😃😃

One could say I am obsessed with not letting inanimate objects get the best of me, if i want to fix you then fix you i must. Along the years I've broken a couple of items and with luck fixed a few. What I'm trying to say here is I've always been fascinated by electronics,

I can remember the first time I used the Internet... It was while I was in secondary school. I had to take 3 buses to get to the cybercafe. I opened my first email account, toluy2kaina@yahoo.com.
It felt like the greatest achievement I must say. Then, the internet was dialup and it was quite slow,  but I loved it.

I pick up new things easily and I learnt how to use the Internet pretty fast. I basically learned how to look things up and we all know that back then it was harder to get things done online  than it is now, that was in year 2000. After I completed secondary school, I boasted to my friends about how I had used the internet and how I had an email address and they all seemed impressed. It really felt good to be the enlightened one. They (my friends) wanted to see how to use the internet, so we all took a cab to the nearest town and looked for a cyber cafe. I remember showing them how to use the browser and getting an email address, i remember it all.

Well fast forward to to some years later, these same guys turned out to be Internet fraudsters, they had fancy cars and they hadprotégés. In my head I was like "while I am in school trying to get a degree these fellows are using the knowledge I shared with them to do wrong. I bred a band of thieves and they enriched thier pockets while I'm still trying to get by,

Imagine! "

Jealousy or just what

.Is Jealousy insecurity?  Does it mean people who are happy and all don't get jealous?  I'm like here looking, laying on my bed, and typing this message .

I've been made to believe that Jealousy was a sign you are insecure.. You are joking right?
If you love something or someone you shall protect it or him or her.

When there's NEED for it.

Don't try to protect it before the danger comes or else you become the danger.

Everyone gets jealous. Everyone acts differently.

For Ever Young

Yes I am play Video Games a LOT.

when i mean a lot as in i really do. The Good Part is My Girlfriend doesn't mind in fact she likes playing video games too, she got really good at Mortal Kombat that i get real competition when we play against each other.

She would ask me, "so when we have kids would you still be playing video games?". that question tho.. lol picture me and my kids struggling over the controller :-(.

the kinds of things i have done to play video games, i have skipped school, gone home late and i care if u don't like me you have video games hey you must be my friend,

I really love my games, but come to think of it. these video games are not small kids something, how can a kid play a game like " The Last Of Us" and still be normal. I used to think i was alone till i ran into a colleague at work who is much older and has kids and plays video games, yaay my other colleagues don't understand how we could be talking about such at work lol.

Is it childish to play video games? is it childish to watch animated movies?
i have gotten comments like "are you a baby?" or "this movie is a movie meant for kids."

I don't fancy football or Soccer, as in one bit i don't have anything against anyone who does unless they start with that stupid ass argument, loud and i am trying to sleep (sigh).

do you even understand me at all? hehehe i am just talking about everything huh?

I'm going back to work

TTYL

Tolu
13/01/15

I CAN'T EXPLAIN THIS

Hello,
Happy new years, i made up my mind i was going to start writing on this blog again. Hopefully more frequently.

These past few days, i experienced some stuff that i would rather not go through if i had the option.
Seeing a loved one go through what they call depression. 

Well sha in this part of our world what do people know about stuffs like that, how would you relate with someone who says they are unhappy and they cant seem to climb out of that mood no matter what you try. If a typical person hears, they would say the individual is spoilt or over pampered or just be totally confused about what the whole concept is.

I don't fully grasp it and no one truly does, but experts say its just your mind playing tricks on you, like giving negative thoughts priority over positive ones.

It is a serious issue, and you need to exercise a lot of patience. You are going to get frustrated, Yes you will do not give up, the person would need you.

So when you feel like you cant explain what they cant explain, have some chill it won't hurt no one

Tolu
12/01/15